Thursday, April 5, 2012

Turkish men and Europe

Sorry for not writing in a while. I've been extremely busy. Last week I had to entertain two Turkish men, partners in a project. They were very agreeable but spending 16 hours a day with them proved very tiresome. On Friday I left, I left them with other colleagues and I left to the mountains with another group of Turkish, Irish and Slovaks. We were a group of around 30 people. It was great but sleeping only a few hours a night for two weeks, can get exhausting. We had the chance to meet a beautiful lady with an autistic son and a daughter - Miss Romania. She touched our hearts talking to us about her efforts and pleading for social inclusion of these children. I managed to see Peles and Bran, which I didn't see before in my travels. I tried to learn some Irish dances, without great success, they are too complex for me. I enjoyed listening to some nostalgic Slovak ladies singing beautifully and then laughing contagiously with a Tokay glass of wine in my hand. I got to know a bit this people, about whom I didn't have any knowledge before. I discovered that they are kind of a combination of Hungarians and Russians and a soul bigger than both countries.
All was great until the day before their departure. The head of the Turkish team, decided to surprise us with a demand of changing the plans. It was very "nice" of him to do this and also to make us other financial surprises. Not even the other teams intervention, could convince him to be flexible and find a solution for a compromise. But I think that this development of the situation showed us all what was in his mind.
His behaviour of hitting on a colleague, me and another Slovak lady, beside the fact that he is married and has a teenage boy, and his way of talking and behaving towards our team, composed in majority of women, were very revealing. Discussing with the others, we concluded that some Turkish men feel threatened bu women in charge. They are not used to this, they are used only with subdued women, as those for their team, whose voice you couldn't hear. For example, one of the Turkish ladies was a good English-speaker and very smart, as I had the chance to find out in some private talks, but while men were around, she didn't say anything. The other partners thought for the entire time we spent together that she doesn't speak English at all and she is very shy. The head of their team, also had a very offensive behaviour towards the other Turkish lady in the group, although in front of her he was saying she she was the financial authority who was managing their finances. The fact that there were only two women in a group of 11 people in the Turkish team, also was saying something.
Taking to the Slovak team, we concluded that the Turkish want to join European Union, but they don't really want to respect its principles, rules of equality among sexes.They are very traditionalist  although they want to show off a thin layer of modernism. They really have a problem with women in charge. I don't know if misogynistic is the best word for this, but this is the only one which comes to my mind when seeing their behaviour.

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